Dual parent incomes

I found it interesting in this week’s podcast/ instructor’s notes that dual income families are actually found to be happier. It has been shown to reduce stress and increase mental and physical well-being. This is because a parent is able to compensate for un-happiness in one area by being successful in another area.  For example if a parent has a bad day at work then they can come home and feel satisfied by helping their family. Or vice-a-versa. It also improves their social well-being by being able to connect to others. Confidence is also increased by being successful in a career. It also helps the marriage by having similarity in life styles and being able to connect with each other.

I have been a stay at home for the last five years in till here recently. (Besides going to school). I love to be at home with my children but the burden of not being able to help out finically and not having a social life had brought me to the decision to go to school and then get a job. I love being able to go to work now and I feel like I appreciate my kids a little more when I get home after not being able to see them all day. My husband on the other hands doesn’t understand why I would want to work and wants me to watch our children, but to me I feel more independent, and happier working.

If I could research this more, I would like to know if the kids are happier because the parents are less stressed. I would think it would have a lot to do with if the child has a positive, loving caregiver in the absents of their parents.  

Emerging into Adult Hood

I found it interesting in this week’s topic how emerging adult hood is happening later in life than it did a few decades ago. This is considered the period of time between late teens and mid-to-late 20’s. It was common in the past for this to be the time where young adults got married and started having children in the Western culture. That has greatly been replaced with young adults using this time for identity exploration. Many young adults are now taking this time to educate, experience different career options, and gain a view point on the world. 

I think that this is a very important time for identity exploration. I know that I am grateful that I had this time to discover myself and my career. When I was in my early 20’s I thought that I wanted to become a Real Estate agent. I later decided that is not what I wanted to do and was able to go back to school to become a nurse. I am glad that I did this before I had two children, because then I don’t think it would be possible; finically and time wise with going to school and working. Even though I see a lot of mothers in their late teens and early 20’s accomplishing this, I personally don’t think I could.

Adolescents with eating disorders

I found it interesting how the video, ‘Advertising’s Image of Women: Killing Us Softly’, can be related to adolescents developing eating disorders. In the video it shows how the media is pressuring girls to be thin and beautiful from a very young age. This really starts to affect a girl’s self-esteem when she begins to go through puberty. I believe this is why adolescents are at greater risk for developing anorexia nervosa, and bulimia nervosa. Especially for girls, who make up 90% of the eating disorder population. It makes since you hardly ever see advertisements marketing to the male population.

The reason I picked this topic this week is because I watched a friend go through this in middle school, and it still is affecting her into adult hood. She was bulimic at first. I remember the first time I seen her throw up. We were on the bus at a volleyball game and one of the girls pointed out she was going to walk behind the tree and vomit. Most of the girls laughed and I was in shock and didn't know what to do; I guess no one understood how to help her. She continued to this for a couple years, and then she became anorexic. She became so thin she started losing her hair. It was not in-till several years of counseling and the desire to have a child that she let up on her starvation. Even after she had a child she went back to her old ways. The thing I don’t understand is that people that knew her condition was complementing her on her weight loss. I feel that there should be education and how to help your peers out in situations like that. Even today I don’t know what I could say to help her.

Parenting styles

I found it interesting how different parenting styles can have such dramatic effects on how a child might turn out. The book breaks down these styles into four categories; authoritarian parents are very strict and show little to no affection to their child. They do not take into consideration how their child feels. This can lead to poor self-esteem, depression, and the child could lack empathy. Permissive (indulgent) parents are very caring to their child but they do not set rules. The down side is that children are more likely to get into trouble and it may lead to substance abuse problems. Permissive parenting is almost as bad as the uninvolved parent. This can also cause a child to get into trouble and have substance abuse problems. The only difference is that permissive parenting can increase child’s self-esteem whereas the uninvolved parent can cause the child to have depression. The most effective style of parenting is the authoritative style. This is where there is lots of love but there are still consistent rules.

It made me think about a family that had authoritarian style parenting. They did not let their child have play dates except for special occasions. The child’s day was filled with school work and band practice and never let the child have any down time to do the things they wanted. It started to show the stress that was put on the child when would have break downs for no reason. I guess I just don’t see how parents think it’s okay to except so much out of a child. Maybe it’s their culture. I personally like to think of myself as an authoritative parent most of the time. There needs to boundaries and children need to know that they are loved.